Which Winless Team will be the 1st to Win a Game

Going into Week 4 our mighty CFL Standings show us that 3 teams are STILL without a win. As per usual they are perennial laggards, ne’er-do-wells and Sissies! Get it in gear you incompetent jerks! How dare you drag the rest of our mighty league down year after year with your endless ineptitude!!!

Hey wait a minute… one of those winless teams is MY TEAM. Well this changes everything. I take back the word ‘perennial’. It’s not really a football term anyway and I’m sorry for using such a limp-wristed descriptor like that this on our manly football thread. For now on I will use more appropriate language and think hard before I start typing. I will also shower more than once a month and wear underarm deodorant under BOTH arms, starting tomorrow. No more of that ‘one-perfumed-pit-is good-enough’ crap for this poster.

Anyway here’s where we are in the standings at the end of Week 3:

Alphabetically the winless teams in question are, Edmonton, Hamilton, and Winnipeg (my team). Please, no name calling. Play nice. We losers have already suffered enough.

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Which currently winless CFL team will win it’s first game this week (or maybe next week):

  • Edmonton Elks
  • Hamilton TigerCats
  • Winnipeg Blue Bombers
0 voters

Good luck!

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Alphabetically?

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I saw that boo boo just after I uploaded the poll. Sorry about that.

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I’m voting against my own team to say the bombers win this weekend here in cowtown. They can’t go 0-4

The elks won’t beat BC in BC

The cats won’t beat Ottawa in Ottawa

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I was hoping your reply was something along the lines of ‘numerically they are #1 for me so that transfers over to alphabetically too’ :grin:

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I like your reply better than the reply I was typing up. You are wise beyond your years. My Bombers are indeed better than road-kill (MOST road-kill). If the universe unfolds as it should maybe I won’t have to wear a bag over my head come Monday. :smiley:

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Is this the start of the 2024 Paper Bag Bowl Thread?

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I dunno yet. The only thing I know for sure is… if we don’t start winning we’re definitely going start whining.

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That sounds a lot worse than winning or wining…but it gives new meaning to #ForTheW

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I always wait to start it – you can’t have a Paper Bag Bowl Thread without enough empirical evidence for the bags. But we’re getting close. The first team to go 0-4 will likely force my hand. :smiley:

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Edmonton Elks?

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That’s what I’m thinking, yeah, but we could have three teams going 0-4 this week so maybe I’ll wait until end of week.

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Just wondering but has there ever been a year before where three teams have all started out at 0-4 ? I mean it could quite possibly happen that a 3rd of the league is actually winless after this week of play .

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“Has there ever been a year before where three teams have all started out at 0-4?” Interesting question Bobo.

I’m not sure what the answer is but it won’t take too long for someone around here to find out. You know how great the CFL is at keeping statistics. I have complete faith that the punch cards are already being punched as we speak.

Agree, :grin:
Bombers
Elks
Ticats

It’s the homer in me…

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See?! That works!

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You have a Homer in you too? Geez… and all this time I thought it was just me who had that inner voice telling me to press the little button labelled ‘Do not press’.

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The truth is you don’t have enough paper bags after the Ford government mandated LCBO (Ontario liquor stores) to re-supply customers with them after LCBO decided to no longer provide them.

Maybe he meant for the residents of Hamilton and not the whole province.

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The dreaded Trifecta.

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