I'm New/CFL Fan Free Agent

Cflnewbie, you should rank the team from 1 to 9 and always cheer for the team that ranks the higher on your list in a given match-up. That way, you can cheer four times each week.

Here are the best reasons to cheer for each team, and the best reasons to hate each:

  • BC: (+) They have no known weaknesses. Dave Dickenson is a surgeon who can make any defensive unit look bad. Most of the Lions players are gentlemen. They always win. They are the top contender for this year's Grey Cup. (-) They wear orange. They can't manage to start a rivalry with anyone. They will kick the ass of any other team you may like.

  • Calgary: (+) They're coming back from the dead after many years of being a circus. Joffrey Reynolds (HB) is becoming one of the league new sensation. If you like hot-dogging, Jeremaine Copeland and Nik Lewis are the hot duo you'll enjoy. (-) They let a horse poo on the field. Their QB is Mr. Turnover (he plays well, but will fumble or throw interceptions every game, especially if the game is thihgt)­.

  • Edmonton: (+) The CFL flagship team. They made the playoffs 34 years in a row (and counting). They have the most star-filled roster of the league. They never lose many games and usually don't lose by many points. Only team in the CFL to play on real grass. (-) They are the most hated team by the rest of the league because they never fail. The main reason they are so good is because they buy out all the free agents they want, without regards to the salary cap (which is not enforced in the CFL, hence, making it a joke). They don't develop players. They just hire experienced ones. Their GM is a maniac that will fire anyone he wants if the team don't win the Grey Cup.

  • Saskatchewan: (+) They can't convince any star player of moving to Regina, so all their star players were locally developped. They never stop trying even though failing a lot and often. They have the most passionate fans in probably all professionnal sports leagues. All of their units showcase exciting players. Corey Holmes is the one example every father should give their son when it comes to being great both on and off the field. (-) When the season start, you always now up from the begining they will fall short. They are community-owned so they don't have much money to spend on good free agents.

  • Winnipeg: (+) Err... they... errr... they possibly have some QBs that will be great in a few years... Uhhhm... They have Milt Stegall, whose entry to the Hall of Fame is garanteed. Charles Roberts is an electrifying player in spite of being on a team that doesn't help him at all. They have a powerfull punter, if that may ever be a reason to cheer for a team. (-) They play boring football, thanks to a clueless coach unable to identify flaws and correct them. They hire all the garbage the Stampeders releases. They won't go to the Grey Cup game. They failed lamentably to fill the stands the last time they hosted the Grey Cup game.

  • Toronto: (+) Great coach with total class. A dangerous defensive unit. Some people also think they have the best kick returner in the league in Bashir Levingston, but I believe he is the most overrated guy at this position. Even his teammate Arland Bruce is better. They are the defending Grey Cup champs. (-) They are from Toronto, and that naturally comes with a condescending attitude. They spend money they don't have on players not always worth it, because they know the league will always bail them out if they get financially in trouble, because... well, they are Toronto. They don't develop much talent. They tend to hire veterans who made their proofs elsewhere. They have the worst stadium to watch a football game in.

  • Hamilton: (+) Dany McManus was once a great QB. Troy Davis was once a great running back. Greg Marshall was once a great coach. Fans still hang on in spite of being 10-31-1 in the last three seasons. (-) They plain suck. They display no life, no hungryness, and they look like they don't care at all.

  • Montreal: (+) The team that has the best record of the last 10 years. They never player for under .500 in a season since they reappeared. They have the winningest coach of the CFL. Anthony Calvillo has his name written everywhere in the record book and actually seems to be the only one with a chance to catch Damon Allen's records. There is not one CFL fan who doesn't love Ben Cahoon, who is like the Corey Holmes of the East. Ezra Landry, a 5 foot 3 kick returner, is a show in itself. (-) Don Matthews is a stubborn arrogant bastard (but it's okay if he's the coach of your team). They played bad recently. They always choke in the playoffs (they won the Grey Cup once in the past 9 years, when they were a top contender and division champions 8 times). They never re-sign their star players if they ask for good money (except Calvillo).

Ottawa: (+) In the last three years, they were a losing team decimated by injuries and pillaged of its good players in the off-seasons; a team where no free agent wanted to go and financially always on the verge of bankruptcy. Still, they fielded a winning and exciting team, which should earn them many kudos. Joseph, Ranek, Armstead, Collier, Banks are a few of many other reasons to cheer for them. They need all the fan support they can get. (-) It is still too early to know if they a really good, or just surfing a good wave like the Tiger-Cats were last year. Many players are too injury prone. Their cheerleaders are ugly.

...or maybe pick your favourite team based on some of those fans who would be cheering with you, examples:

Montreal - Third and Ten, ro1313, assorted fans who venture into the LCF Conversation forum - right off the bat you get to buddy up with two mods guaranteeing great Mafia-style protection should you start saying ridiculous and/or corrosive things about Toronto, but you have to chant motivational sayings about the greatness that is The Don lest you be cast into iniquity. Membership includes complimentary access to the Celine Fan Club.

Toronto - hellothere, saskargo, other universe-centric believers - HT will join in with your fight against all things Alouette no matter what the actual subject is about, and will keep you well informed on TV stats, saskargo only comes out of her hermit hole periodically to fling the accumulated refuse of prolonged seclusion towards rider fans, will tell you she loves you as a fellow argonut fan and then disappear again for weeks. Membership includes “Damon Allen IS God� semi-permanent tattoo.

Hamilton - BigDave, Yeast#5 - by joining the tiger-cats fan squad you automatically become the most vocal supporter after your first post. Aside from running the Virtual Grey Cup for us (thanks again), BigD is suffering from acute hibernation, Yeasty is devoting a questionable amount of time in the Calgary chatroom and the rest of the tabby fans are spending more bandwidth pointing out the inadequacies of the argonuts gardening skills than cleaning up their own backyard. Membership includes one beer.

Ottawa - (insert pre-nom)GADES(insert post-nom) – we are all a little frightened right now with this bunch, sort of like when you take your nephew hunting for the first time and you’ve just placed a loaded rifle in his teenage hands, what was once harmless is now dangerous. Upside: You get to put henna war tattoos on your face and wear a grass skirt. Membership includes copy of Lonnie G’s ‘Girls I Have Loved’ Diary.

Winnipeg – Kanga Kucha, PIGSEYE – As a BB fan you, along with a dozen or so blue.gold faithful, you get to decide weekly whether to slit your wrists or punch the face of a fellow fan for their take on things. But KK and PigI bring a calming effect to all. In my minds eye I like to picture these two like Jim and Louie on TAXI. To further your Continuing Education soon the BB faithful will be receiving instructional pamphlets from the Riders on the operational procedures for placement of manure on lawns. Membership includes Crying Towel (freshly washed and delivered from un-used Calgary stockpile).

Saskatchewan – The entire cast of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest – beside joining the ranks of the most loyal fans on planet earth you can say: “My club has the most wicked website of all, but I can’t show it to you, you just have to believe me�. Membership includes John Deere ballcap.

Calgary - RedandWhite, redwhite2005, other stuck-up yuppies - supposed rednecks who refuse to register their rifles, drive very un-environmentally friendly SUVs and eat way too much red meat making them completely despised by pretty much everyone else in the forum. Membership includes stock options in Shell and a ‘I Brake for Nothing’ bumpersticker.

Edmonton – supertoe, GoEsksGo, assorted City of Champion believers – Okay, you know what, with this group you actually have something to cheer for. Pro: the team on the field is something to be proud of. Con: You need binoculars to see the game from the first row ‘cause the stadium is too frickin big. Membership comes with Large Size can of Arrogance Body Spray.

BC – RoarLionsRoar, Chronicguy, rag tag bunch of ‘hey Dude’ surf bums – most of the discussions you will hold will be surrounding the exceptional accruements of the Lion Bandwagon and pondering how far to the ground the jump really is. You will have to agree that the BC Lions are completely invincible now that Todd Bertuzzi has been re-instated and the Grey Cup should never leave the Pacific Time Zone. Membership comes with hemp sandals.

Heheheh... Nice portait of us all. Gets me wondering how come we all walk free.

The best part was about Hamilton. It's so true. No one ever seems to go at bat for the tabbies.

Maybe by year end, the Stamps wil lhave two more fans: Yeast#5 and Kirsten84...

"The entire cast of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest"??? RedandWhite, I vehemently deny ever participating in such a cast. . . :wink:

…you’re nurse ratchet…dispensing meds to the crazies…rrrraow, love the white nylons…

Third, No star players in Regina ? What ? Why are other teams defences restructuring their game plan in order to stop Corey and Kenton ? ( who I might add lead the league in rushing. ( wait.....they are not stars.) Five O-lineman who have all been league all-stars ? (Nope they are not stars either. ) Dominguez, ( nope he's not a star at all, especially when he is healthy, he is garbage. ) Jackie Mitchell, nope he sucks too. Nate Davis, nope, Benefield, nope. Man, the Riders are a bunch of no names. There are no all-stars here. Look somewhere else.

P.S. sarcasm is at an all time high in this post.

Hey K-Y,

I said of Saskatchewan: "all their star players were locally developped". The Riders didn't "buy" all the star players you named when they were already stars. These players BECAME stars while playing in Saskatchewan, which is pretty complimentary to your organization...

So, here I am, sitting at my computer, when I suddenly read a post wherein a previously nice-to-me poster calls me Nurse Ratchet. Nurse Ratchet??? What the hell??? I'd almost rather be lumped in with the crazies. . . :wink:

ROTFM, RandW.

you ALWAYS pull for the home team ... you're in minnesota you say ...

Then you're a BOMBER FAN ... Based purely on proximatey.

And if you deny your true heritage of being a Bomber fan .. simply by location .. then you shall suffer the consequences .... You're only 16 .. so you probably don't understand the consequences just yet ... but you will (in due time)... so make the wise decision .. Become a Bomber ... Blue and True ... start drinking Labbatt's Blue ... its the Blue Bomber equivelant to Spinach to popeye ... It makes Ye' Strong! Hyuk Hyuk Hyuk!!

StatiK76
GO BOMBERS!!!

.......(R&W sees Statik with his right arm curved around empty air space) statik, you drunk again? who the heck are you talking to?.........

.......jm02, jk'g pal ol' buddy gurlfriend......I don't lump you in with the rest, but someone has to be in charge of the asylum........

S'pose it's better to run it than be held captive. . .I'll stick with Ratchet for now, but I want a buy-out option. . . :smiley: