Bill Cosby's funny Street Football sketch sure captured the improvisational spirit of street or sandlot football. That spirit used to be a CFL trademark. Not this year. The technicians are winning and something must be done.
And that doesn't mean resorting to the bag of trick plays the Stampeders threw at the stumbling Montreal Alouettes on Thursday night. Stampeders head coach Tom Higgins, perhaps overcompensating for his bland personality, never met a trick play he didn't like. Tricks are fine, but the CFL's problem is too deeply rooted to be solved by flea flickers, fake punts and the like.
What's needed, league-wide, is a concerted commitment to simply "going for it." You watch a lot of CFL games these days and they're not going for 'it' at all. They're going side-to-side. Which is paint drying on the barn door to watch.
And sure, we get it: that sort of pass is what the defences are giving them, as the "schemers" say. Which may mean that, long-term, the CFL should look at tweaking its rules to loosen things up. Sort of like the NHL did, with great success last season. The NHL's theme was 'flow' -- keep the game moving. The CFL needs to find ways to redirect things north-south instead of the mind-numbingly dull side-to-side shenanigans.
For years, for instance, the NBA was strictly man-to-man defence. Zone defence was against the rules. They got away from that in recent years, but that doesn't mean something similar might not work for the CFL, awash as it is in cover two-, cover three-, cover four-man under and on and on until the passing game is utterly stifled.
Maybe the league should man up -- literally. No zone pass coverage. A team tries to deploy any kind of zone, however cleverly disguised, call it illegal defence and award the offence an automatic first down. Short-term, it seems basic that teams need to get the quarterbacks moving to give the defences more to think about than chasing down the man in the pocket and pancaking him like a tackling dummy.
It's curious that in a league in which the prototypical QB could hurt you as badly with his legs as with his arm or smarts, that type of player is in short supply. Was it really that long ago that a quick scan around the league found a young, frisky Damon Allen, Matt Dunigan, Tracy Ham, Doug Flutie and Danny Barrett, all runnin' and gunnin' for their teams to the great delight of the fans?
In today's CFL, Calgary's Henry Burris clearly is a descendant of that group, along with Kerry Joseph. But how many other quarterbacks strike fear with their ability to get out of the pocket and make mayhem? Dave Dickenson? Anthony Calvillo? Please.
A 43-year-old Allen can spin his once golden wheels from time to time for those Argonauts. He can't do it consistently, but he may do it often enough to keep defences honest. The Eskimos' Ricky Ray is deceptively effective as a runner, which he displayed in Edmonton's 30-28 loss to the Lions in B.C. on Aug. 18.
"A.J. Gass always tells me this every game: 'It's a heartbreaker when a quarterback can scramble out and pick up a first down,' " Ray said recently. "It just kills defences.
"They have great coverage downfield, they're doing well and all of a sudden the quarterback comes out and picks up a big first down."
So let's see more of that.
Speaking of using their legs, isn't it about time the CFL loosened the leash on the downfield blocking on kick returns? A good return isn't just exciting, it's like a faceoff win in hockey -- it sets a team up for a scoring drive.
But this year it has been painful to watch the league's truly superb return men cradle a punt, take fitful stutter-steps this way and that, looking for all the world like ailing chickens in a farmyard as they try to find a seam. With TDs on returns down nearly 90 per cent, is there any doubt they have choked off part of the league's special appeal?
Yes, quarterbacks out in space can get injured, just as cover men can if the blockers get over-zealous on kick returns. But that can be managed by careful officiating. What's tough to manage right now is the prospect of watching a CFL game from start to finish.