:thup: According to reporter Marty York, Federal politician Belinda Stronach has come out in support of Gainer the Gopher regarding the controvery created by the Stampeder organization for not allowing the Riders Mascot at the Western Semi-Final in Calgary. Stronach said to York,"... it is very sad that Gainer and I are always being picked on. This is a travesty! Gophers have rights too. Stamps owners should retract their negative statements about this lovable and loyal creature!!!!!!!!!!!"
:thup: According to Marty York (reporter) ex-Toronto Maple Leaf and womanizer Tie Domi has come out in support of Rider mascot Gainer the Gopher in the recent controversy regarding the denial of the Rider mascot into the Western Final!! Domi was quoted as saying "What gives, this guy is just a fiesty fan wanting to inspire his team and fans! Belinda and I , sorry I think it is shameful that Gainer is being targeted as a rabble rouser!"

Rider Pride Nation Wide

:thup: According to reporter Marty York, ex- BC Lion fan actress Pamela Anderson has blasted Stampeder management for denying Gainer the Gopher entrance to McMahon Stadium for the Western Semi-Final. " Why he is so cute I could just pick him up and take him home to bed !", exclaimed Anderson, " Why would anyone not like Gainer",questioned the ex-Baywatch star. " Calgary fans should be ashamed!!!, concluded Anderson.!!!!!!

CFL Forever
Riders Rule
Stamps Drool!!!!!!!!

And I never thought I could actually lose intelligence by reading a post. There's a first for everything I suppose.

:thup: Ex-NHL coach and Hockey Night in Canada broadcaster and colour commentator Don Cherry has come out strongly against Calgary Stampeder management for their decision to ban Rider mascot Gainer Gopher! According to Marty York, reporter extra-ordinaire, Cherry emphatically said, "... let the mascots fight it out in the trenches on the sidelines!! I'd put my money on that gopher too- he is one tough Canadian rodent-not soft like those Calgary swedish dogs!!!!!!!"

Riders Rule
Stamps Drool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can someone get banned for not being funny?

:thup: In an unprecedented move by the Canadian parlaimentarians, Canadian MP's have sent a stern message to the Calgary Stampeder Football management for their apparent violation of the Charter of Rights banning Saskatchewan Roughrider mascot Gainer the Gopher from the CFL Western Semi-Final. "To see a unanimous motion from the House is unbelievable and encouraging for the country, commented Prime Minister Stephen Harper , himself a Calgarian!!. This could be a move that brings together the country!!!!!!!!!!!!!" " I say Canadians should denounce the Stampeder management and support Gainor in this stressful time, and, Go Riders Go!!"

Riders Rule
Stamps Drool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:thup: A CBC radio poll suggests over 92%of Canadians support Gainer the Gopher being allowed into the Western Semi-Final on Sunday. Pollster Alan Gregg said, " Except for a pod of carrot farmers in Alberta who had their crops tampered with by gophers, it was clear Canadians thought the move to ban Gainer by the Stampeder management was totally unfair."

Riders Rule
Stamps Drool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The United Nation's Security Council has just passed Resolution No. 1721, demanding the Stampeder organization back down from "trampling" over the rights of minority colonies. France was most condemming, as one diplomat was heard saying, "This cowboy terrorism cannot be tolerated".

Who'da thought?

Don't worry...nobody is going to ban you....

Go Turkey, go!!

Riders Rule
Stamps Drool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Donald Rumsfeld has been reported as saying, "the USA takes Gainergate very seriously, and unless the Stampeders follow UN resolution #1721 to the letter, America may be forced to consider regime change. American intelligence agencies have overwhelming evidence, stemming back years to the West semi-final of 2004, that Tom Higgins is mad.
Third down gambles are a menace to the stability of the world and a hardship to the poor people of Alberta."

In a follow up, Rumsfeld denied America was considering a nuclear response, but merely said, "the President has all his options open to him".

Riders Rule
Stamps Drool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rumsfeld also flattly denied the possible attack has anything to do with oil.

:thup: From coast to coast CFL fans are jumping on the Riders bandwagon after the incredible slight given to Gainer the Gopher, the Riders mascot by the Stamps brass. Gainer got Goosed banners are selling like hotcakes in Halifax. Gainer the Gopher sont la banners are popping up everywhere in Quebec. Rennegade fans in Ottawa have been chanting 'We want Gainer " outside the parlaiment buildings. Even arch rival Bomber fans have lent support with Gopher perogies selling out in St. Boniface. As well, laid back westcoasters have packed Zenzero juice bars in Vancouver chanting zenlike sayings like "... gophers are gods!" It's a phenomenom - Gainer the Gopher for Prime Minister.

Riders Rule
Stamps Drool and are Cruel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

another gainer topic :oops:

British Prime Minister Tony Blair held an emergency press conference announcing that the British Parlaiment was considering revoking the British North America Act should Gainer not be permitted into McMahon stadium on Sunday. Blair said it was an international outrage and added that the Queen was also fuming adding that he had not seen her so mad since Prince Charles stepped on horse manure carrying it in on his riding boots into Buckingham Palace. All England is behind Gainer and the Riders!!!!!!!

Riders Rule
Calgary Drools!!!!!!!!

It now appears that in these final hours, the Stampeders have indeed relented their attack on freedom - sort of. Gainer however has not been given unrestricted access to the field which still concerns members of the U.N. It now appears the U.N. will be sending inspectors from various neutral countries, to verify that proper access is indeed granted to the little gopher. There is also a growing concern of a backlash from certain radical, conservative and fundamentalist civilians.

Stay tuned....

Well, this is one of the funniest threads I've ever read. Turkeybend has a hell of an imagination.

I concurr hw, good stuff.

No, another Creative writting topic by Turkeybend!

Turkey must have poured a double, he usually limits himself to one or two "news sources". This was multiple!